Even successful people want more self-confidence. People who exude self-assurance easily influence others, get more promotions, earn more money, and seem to have more fun and success.
Some people naturally seem to have it; perhaps they were born lucky with the right kind of parents. However, no one gives you self-confidence; it is something each of us has to develop on our own. In any case, knowing a few strategies for improving self-confidence will ensure that you can improve your confidence and reap the benefits.
Everyone has a baseline level of confidence. Some people have unshakable confidence built upon strong foundations; others find their confidence is a bit shaky when faced with mistakes, criticisms, and failures.
Lack of self-confidence afflicts a lot of people, but it’s usually a struggle that’s kept hidden and denied. However, a false bravado does a poor job of replacing authentic self-belief and confidence in your abilities. In fact, this false bravado is typically a recipe for self-fulfilling failures.
Oftentimes confidence problems go undetected, as many people try to cover up insecurities by over-achieving. However this tactic of over-achieving doesn’t actually work because of the negativity bias of the brain. We never forget errors and deficits. We carry around negative scripts from experiences during childhood, from our parents, siblings, and school teachers. This undermines confidence. No one is immune to these negative experiences in life; every one of us carries a kernel of under-confidence and self-doubt.
“Whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right.”
– Henry Ford, U.S. industrialist
Next week we’ll be taking a more in-depth look at the differences between false confidence and authentic confidence. As always, I’d love to hear from you. I can be reached here or on LinkedIn.
